你给我的错觉。。。。
Sunday, February 28, 2010.

有时候。。。选择男朋友时。。。
我都会很计较。。。从来不马虎。。。。
也从不相信一见钟情。。。。
往往现实生活中。。。。就是没有自己想拥有的白马王子。。。
其实。。。我的要求。。。简单得来。。。不随便。。。
他必须。。。
1。不是对每个女生都很好。。。i mean...（会让每个女生产生错觉的那种好）
2。不需要很帅。。。。但对我来说。。（有上进心及认真的男孩最帅了。。。）
3。做事情时有自己的原则。。。
4。胆大心细。。。。不马虎。。不计较。。。。大方。。。
4。让我觉得他能让我依靠。。。在危急时保护我。。。
5。和我在一起时。。。。不是因为想在我身上得到什么益处。。。。而是真正的了解我。。
真正地接受我是个怎么样的人。。。。
6。对我坦白。。。。

我不祈求什么家庭背景。。。不约束它的自由。。。。
只希望。。他对我的真诚。。。是发自内心深处的。。。。

但就是找不到！！！ish!!!哈哈。。。。弄到我好像很desperate这样。。。
其实事情`不是这样的拉。。。而是在我三个好朋友当中。。。。
我是最后一个还没拍拖的。。。。让我觉得自己好像出了什么问题是的。。。
但我终觉得。。。要开始一段感情。。。并不容易。。。
也没想像中的简单。。。
并不是说。。。有感觉就能在一起。。。
我相信。。。。太快开始的一段感情。。。是不会长久的。。。（no offence...its juz an personal opinion)...因为你还不够了解对方。。。。
还没发现他的缺点。。。。
当你发现那一切一切时。。。
你会强逼自己去接受。。。。
当你无法忍受时。。。就byebye 咯！！

最近发现自己喜欢他。。。。
很想去关心他。。。去爱他。。。。但我很肯定我和他是没可能的。。。
因为它一定不会喜欢我。。。
我看。。。。是他对我的好。。让我产生错觉吧。。
几时发现我喜欢他？？？- 当我看到他对其他女孩一样好时。。。心里不舒服咯。。。正常啦。。。
幸亏他不会看华语。。。也幸亏我没跟人说过他是谁。。。。
无论如何。。。。我都会期待。。。。
一直为他献上默默地祝福。。。
我就是这样。。。。永远都是做等待的那个。。。。
等待着那么的一天。。。。
但我很清楚地知道我与他的那一天是不存在的。。。

2 comment(s):

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{ 10:13 PM }

later...=)

i shall update later about my 19th birthday=)
this was the best birthday i had so far!!!

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{ 3:30 AM }

i love you...MOM and DAD.....=)

actually i plan to write this post in chinese....but since the software din work out.....
so....yeah...in english then.....
sometimes...when you are alone....in the room...
thoughts juz linger in your mind....good thoughts....sweet memories....
bitter ones....the ones tat make your tear drop....in short...-you are thinking- eventhough your eyes are on the book....your mind is somewhere out there.....i'm sure this is pretty normal...
but today..something juz linger in my mind when my vision starts to turn blur as i was starring at my maths book......

in life....when we are single and available....we try to seek for ppl who are willling to love us with their true heart....or ppl who could lend their shoulders for us to cry on when we are down....or someone who can protect us whenever we are.....i dunno how true is this.....but yeah..i felt the same way too......

think back.... we search....we explore...we study the person....and we start to realize the weaknesses in them......and this is the time we start to judge them.....have negative thoughts on them...critisize them.....evaluate them.....and you'll tell yourself....this is not my cup of tea.....i should seek for a better one.......( even though u noe that there's no one perfect in this world)

however......its onli nw that i realize that there are two ppl in my life who never fail to support me.....never fail to love me even if my wekanesses are unbearable.....alwayz accept me for who i am.....alwayz felt proud of my achievements and most of all......never leave me alone in the dark.......needless to say..they are my most respesctful parents....

talking about parents......we dun need to waste time seeking....exploring...studying....or evaluate them......or may be testing whether they treat you with their true heart.....as the limit of their love to us is the big blue sky up high......so wat for busy searching for the ONE so desperately ,to share your love with ,when there are two person who mean most to you waiting for your love and care at home??? they are the one who you should love most......not anyone else in this world.....and i'm grateful to God that He present me with two GREAT HUMAN BEING.....this should be and this is!! The present i most cherish in my entire life.....I LOVE YOU ....mom and dad......i wish you could see this post.....and i also wish you could understand that even if i didnt really express my care for you all the time.....i'm willing to sacrifice my everything including my life...juz to make you both happy and healthy......=) love you all ALwAYZ.....till the day i die....

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{ 2:54 AM }

i realize who you are...
Sunday, February 21, 2010.

till now onli i realize that true frenz wont forget your birthday no matter wat......
its onli now that i realize how important am i in your heart ( this sentence is dedicated to two people who were once important in my life and had once proved to me how greatful are they for us to be BEST FRIENDS.....and yet on that day where they forgottten my bday....)
thank you for showing me that i'm no more important to you .....
thank you for telling me nothing during my day....
thank you for not being there on that day...
thank you for wateva things you've done on that day where nothing you did related to me ...
A BIG ROUND OF APPLAUSE GOES TO YOU BOTH!!! congratulations!